My name is John Bradley.
I’m from Manchester, UK. I am taking part in the Victorious Voices project to share my healing journey from CSA in the hope it inspires others who have experienced abuse to begin theirs. I’m passionate about breaking the silence around CSA because I want to show other Survivors they don’t have to live in shame as I did for over 30 years. The shame I carried was never mine in the first place: it belonged to the man who abused me.
I was a child, aged 3 when my sexual abuse began and being such a young age, I didn’t know that’s what it was at the time: sexual abuse.
This terrible experience was something I kept to myself for decades until my trauma sadly drove me to a suicide attempt when I was 36.
I have no shame in sharing this because it was the turning point of my life and allowed me to become the man I am today, happy and content with a loving family. I told my wife the reasons behind my attempt, which was initially very difficult. I also told my GP and began to see a psychologist. My healing had begun.
I am lucky to have a tremendous support network through my wonderful wife and beautiful children. They have been there for me in more ways than I can say. I also had trauma therapy and peer-to-peer support from the charity We Are Survivors, an amazing organisation in Manchester that helps male Survivors of all forms of sexual violence.
A key turning point in my healing journey was when I was finally able to realise how strong I was as a child to survive and endure sexual abuse from the age of 3 to 15 ½.
For a long time, I had been ashamed of this part of my life, it was a source of self-loathing, but in recognising my strength and resilience I could transform this into self-love.
The road has not been all smooth sailing of course, I lost family when my mum, step-dad, step-sister and brother did not believe me when I disclosed my abuse to them. I see this as their loss and have met many great people in their place since I shared my story.
On reflection of my journey so far, my message to other Survivors out there is a simple one: You can heal, please don’t give up.